I just spent the last hour writing a post about how life can seem negative and I was tired of having a pessimistic attitude.
All and all a pretty good post, I thought.
Then, as I finished, Angela's 1983 Dell with the Pentium .01 decided it didn't want to save my stuff anymore, and the entire entry was lost.
So much for not having a negative fucking attitude-people who create technology really need a little more training in practical applications and a little less in computer theory. But that's a post for another day.
Looking over my last 2 posts I realize I may have sounded a bit negative, but honestly this isn't my intention.
Its just that, one morning in the recent past I woke up and found myself becoming a bitter old bastard. When I was 18 or 21 my negativity was flippant, off-handed and sarcastic-it always contained an undercurrent of humor. But somewhere along the line I started believing my own bullshit and the negativity became like a mantra.
Every day my mind comes up with ideas for projects I'd like to do. Some of them, like the home-made flame thrower and the time-unraveling machine, are best left unstarted. But many times I just don't do things because of a gigantic doom-colored wall of, "ah, why fucking bother." You how it is-"why bother doing a journal, no one really cares what I think. Or: why do artwork, no one wants to see that shit." So, you end up doing nothing.
So, bitching and moaning was not the point of the last 2 posts. These thoughts had just been eating at me for a while, and I thought maybe a different perspective would be helpful. Not that I think someone will write in the comments box, "well, God is cool" and I'll go-"HOLY SHIT! JESUS BE PRAISED! HE'S RIGHT-GOD IS COOL!". But I hope that by putting some of my thoughts out there someone may offer an insight I may not have considered before.
There's always hope.
We are doing the Atlanta Gift Show in January, which is a BIG deal. There is still a ton to do, and Angela can't help as much as usual, because she's preggo and all. I'm excited, and I can't wait to see how things turn out.
Wish us luck and Happy Holidays.